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Hallelujah

7/9/2015

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Some of you have been there with partners, many of you with parents, or worse, children. Remarkably, most people who have suffered serious loss go through the grief cycle:

Denial     anger     bargaining     depression    acceptance

I’ve done denial and anger, not sure about the bargaining, yes fleeting, deep depression. Anger took the form of jealousy over seeing couples of any age being together. And those resonating with this will know about personal effects, any kind of memory, triggering tears and grief.

Haven’t you done guilt? Scrolling through endless occasions when you acted less well than you should? Can you conjure up times when your partner/parent/child/friend hurt you? Can’t do that yet. Not sure I ever want to.

Music, there’s a real kicker.

Now, I’m unsure how many of you I’m about to lose. Anne has come through [medium Jonathan Brown] from spirit three times and provided a level of consolation which cannot be articulated. And by ‘come through’ I mean I have had conversations with her. But life isn’t that simple when grief and emotions are raw. After the first ‘communication’ I was elated, high as a kite. The second, down and hugely emotional. Because she had left me as a warm-bodied, loving presence, an integrated part of me which I thought was eternal. So, yes, priceless communication, but no Anne. The third time, I have slowly been coming to terms with it all. Emotions less wild.

For those still with me, the most supportive thing I have done, outside of help from family and friends, has been to read ‘White Eagle’ books.

Part of me was prepared to follow Anne to spirit. You know what I mean. However, having been told by Anne that it is my job to carry on with her and Diana’s work down here that is off the agenda completely. My goal, to paraphrase Gandhi, is to be the change I wish to see in the world. Try and stop me.

So, if the penny hasn’t already dropped, the veil between the ‘earth plane’ and spirit is lifting. I realised many years ago, to help move this planet from prison to paradise would never happen through the unsupported efforts of humanity alone. Because we are never alone. And the events of the past 12 months have confirmed, a hundred times, that our lives are not something we can control completely through will power and effort, and no healing process however powerful, can over-ride God’s will. Which is a catch-all term for karma, spirit’s influence and guidance, and our subconscious. And yes, as Anne’s departure has demonstrated, we retain our free will.

Anne has told me, via reference to a card from Wayne Dyer * [who passed a week later than Anne on August 29th] to control my thoughts. This is also one of the key messages from Diana. As I write this, I can let my mind run riot with grief and loss, or I can fill it with thoughts of Anne’s love, humour, strength and compassion for which she was famous.

And when in helping mode, the mode I most cherish, my mind has to be clear and calm. People are depicted daily in the news and popular media as having a runaway train of emotions. Mostly anger, rage, terror and fear. Followed by over-hyped ‘passion’ or excitement when greeted by a Z list ‘celebrity’ or the prospect of winning something.

Joy, sincerity and integrity are a different matter altogether.

I am light years off the role model that was Jesus. But I have had the extreme privilege of sharing my life with a pretty good model of the qualities the world needs most, and that I now hold most dear.

In closing, despite the tsunami of despair that hits us all in these situations, know we are not put here to suffer, but to learn. In the absence of learning the mind again runs riot, and makes us prime candidates for a part in ‘EastEnders.’

Yes Jonathan everything that happens is ultimately for the best. Grief, loss and despair included. Thank you Anne. You are just in another room.

And did I say writing this helps?

Jack Stewart.

* Wayne Dyer’s death certificate will probably say ‘leukaemia’ on it. Anne’s says cancer. She said when she passed she did not have cancer. I’m sure Wayne will have a different view to the doctors too.


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Farewell my lovely...

6/9/2015

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Anne’s formal farewell service was held on September 4th at the Chapel, Great Malvern cemetery. Close family and around 10 friends came.
Anne [and I, and some of those in attendance] are/were Essenes. We began with the Essene prologue:

“Let us enter the eternal and infinite Garden of Mystery, our Spirits in Oneness with the Heavenly Father; our bodies in Oneness with the Heavenly Mother; and our hearts and minds in Oneness with each other and with all of creation.”

Then I just about managed to get through five minutes about my life with Anne [see below]. 5 years wouldn’t be enough, but we will have a go at her 'story' on the celebration day on September 20th.

Spiritualist medium Jonathan Brown who expertly conducted the service, then read out the Cathar prophesy of 1244 CE, the ‘Church of Love.’

Priceless friend Rick Banbury [who also had liaised with the undertakers, set up the room, organised the flowers and kept the day together] delivered the Aramaic version of the Lord’s prayer [too many versions to give a link here], quickly followed by him leading a communal singing of ‘Amazing Grace.’ Cue tissues.

Before the day, Anne had given her approval to the proceedings, said the day would ‘go without a hitch’, and of course, it did.

Jonathan said some closing words, I said the Diana prayer, pausing to compose myself after every line, and we followed Anne’s ‘earthly vehicle’ out of the chapel [‘May it Be’ by Enya playing] to the hearse. Everyone did the equivalent of throwing soil into a grave by throwing a pinch of salt on to the coffin.

Farewell my lovely, our love will live on for ever.

Jack.

The e-mail that follows came though from Sue de Val on September 3rd.

"I feel I must tell you that last week, I had probably the worst gallstone attack I had had. I was doubled up in agony on the bed, thinking I needed to phone 999 if it got any worse. i couldn't breathe or move to phone even if i wanted to do so. the next thing Anne came to me & said the pain will be gone in a minute, i went warm all over & within less than a min all the pain had gone. the pain has never just gone off instantly. i know it was her beautiful soul, still healing from her new home. i also feel that anne wants me to tell you this. am sending much love to you and the family."
 



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    Jack Stewart has been awakening since birth. A left-leaning political career beckoned, as did all manner of inducements by the system. God must have been vigilant, as none of it materialised. Let us accelerate humanity's awakening and help heal the world.

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